Sheila Winter Wallace BodyGateways

This past weekend was potent for me. The level of excitement that I was experiencing last week on the way to the weekend was profoundly palpable, in me. Experiencing both Women of Intensity (WOI) on Saturday (really a Women Gathering [WG]), ’cause I opened it to others who have not yet participated in Decloaking and Living Authentically) and the larger WG (24 women in presence to each other) on Sunday was amazing. As well, four of the women were with me at my home, at various times, over the weekend. So, the conversations started before and continued long after the weekend programs. Wow!

Much moved for me over the weekend… not the least of which was me coming to know and to own, that, as I consider the path that my life has taken in my own evolution of Self, thus far, I have been/AM the ’prep’ for others to be able to step into their accelerating experiences with Selves and with others. The ‘prep’ cook in the kitchen is the one who quietly, expertly, tenaciously and respectfully tends to detailed precision… especially with the knife  in her hand… to the impact and size of each cleanly-edged cut… so that ultimate creation surfaces naturally and flows – and, in the hands of the consummate chef of the Self, delights and nourishes all of the senses.

While I have always imagined mySelf proclaiming who I AM from the Temple roof-top, as the place of significance and meaning to be seen by others, much less by mySelf, I now know that my intrinsic power resides in being the unshakeable, first  and essential rung of the ladder to the peak of the temple roof. That first rung is my place of strength. Without me, that ultimate reach cannot happen. It has taken one who, somehow, has always known, inherently, the pitch of the roof, to really rig and value the first rung of the ladder as essential to reaching its summit. Me.

The word, ‘bridge’, made itself present a few times in my most recent facilitation of Decloaking, a couple of weeks ago; yet, I never noticed the importance of ‘bridge’. The word showed up, again, in
another conversation, today. I finally get it… I know that I am the viaduct (latin for via = road and ducere = to lead), the road that leads… one to one’s unique choice; me to my unique choice.

Today, I finally grok how insidious the process of polarization is to undermining the creation of a meaningful life. It certainly is not the first time that I have contemplated this, yet the dig and over-turning of the soil is much deeper, now. Somehow, as awake as I AM becoming, I still remained in my own Self-denial of any claim to my path as the unshakeable, first and essential rung to the heights of my own greatness. I was constantly and consistently moving away from my own gift because I chose to equate it as unable to be seen, puny, small and unimportant; I could not, therefore would not, see that what is my very presence, my fire, my air, my water, my earth, my field is, in fact, the very truth of whom I AM. My life has always been about working internally and behind the scenes/seen as I propelled mySelf forward… to what I did not know… in the hope of some recognition, to simply count. Today, I finally recognized my own gift as the essential count in, to, and for me; my Self-rig (Self-respect, integrity, and generosity of spirit) of my gift is all that matters. In tears, today, I realized that my very genius lies in claiming, owning and being the precision prep cook, the first  and essential rung of the ladder… that first span to the next span to the next span, etc., of the viaduct to Self.

I have served as viaduct to my own contributions to my own humanity - in so many applications in physical space and time – yet, when, I, as unshakeable, first and essential rung went unrecognized, it was only because I could and would not rig that for me, in me, mySelf. Now I choose that I can; Now I choose that I do.

I have so longed to know my own humility… to BE so satisfied with the greatness in others as my own sacred mirrors. I choose to BE that, now. I know that I AM that, now.